Officials ‘Anxious’ But Its OK Each Invader Gets a Tracking Phone

Officials

Democrat officials are having one of those “what have we done?” kind of weeks as they come to the sudden realization that maybe Joe Biden’s New World Order handlers have gone way too far. CNN breaks the news to disillusioned progressives that team Biden is “increasingly anxious about an expected migrant surge at the end of May.” One which just happens to coincide with “the repeal of a restrictive Trump-era border policy.” The policy preventing outright invasion. It’s okay, though, the experts assure nervous mid-term voters, we’re giving every illegal alien a smartphone so we can track them.

Officials anxious about May

Palace officials are unofficially yelling “mayday” and hitting the panic button hard about the upcoming invasion scheduled to begin May 23. In front of the TV cameras, they act calm, confidant, and in charge. Behind the scenes, “People are worried about where this is going and weathering the storm,” CNN reports. Rats like Jen Psaki are already jumping ship.

The political fallout over the [alleged] Biden administration’s decision to terminate a Trump-era pandemic restriction, known as Title 42, on the US-Mexico border has put into sharp focus the precarious position for the White House.” The red carpet has been officially rolled out and up to 18,000 a day are expected “within hours” of the starting gun going off.

CNN claims they know a guy who knows some real officials and he said, “it was always going to be hard and now they’re closer to the midterms.” Another leak from near the oval office described a “high level of apprehension” these days. “They watch the border numbers every day. They’re very aware of what the situation is at the border.

The sources say nobody can ignore all the screaming coming from the conference rooms with Chief of Staff Ron Klain and Susan Rice “among the top administration officials who have been intimately involved in discussing the situation.” The kind of discussion involving unprintable language and the throwing of handy objects.

Even radically left-wing CNN is calling it a “political minefield.” Everyone expected deplorable Donald Trump supporters to be against the plot but His Wisdom has “also faced pushback from inside his own party for continuing to implement some of his predecessor’s policies that are unpopular with progressives.” Jen Psaki focused real hard on her new gig at MSNBC and looked straight at the cameras to deliver the spin doctor’s prescription. The officials know what they’re doing, she claims.

“I would note the Department of Homeland Security also put together a preparedness plan to continue addressing irregular migration that involves surging personnel and resources to the border, improving border processing, implementing mitigation measures and working with other countries in the hemisphere to manage migration.” Sure, that’ll be swell.

Give em a phone

To the imperial palace, “manage migration” means hand them a “Welcome to America” starter pack, complete with smartphone. They don’t tell them it’s a government tracking device but that’s exactly what it is. Just like every other cell phone in use.

Last week, Psaki explained the whole program. Handing them a phone “will help them stay in touch with ICE officials.” That makes everything all right then. Kamran from Iran would never consider re-rigging it into a detonator or anything.

It didn’t take long for Fox News reporter Peter Doocy to push her button enough to provoke a telling response. “I think you, of all people, since you’ve asked me a range of questions on this topic over time, would recognize that we need to take steps to ensure that we know where individuals are and we can track, and we can check in with them.

She wasn’t supposed to say “track.” Oops. Biden officials call it an “alternative to detention.” Conservatives call it “catch and release.

Each and every invading migrant will need to “call once a week to check in with Immigration and Customs Enforcement officials.” The feds can easily tap the camera for “facial matching” and GPS monitoring is a built in feature of every phone on the planet. Psaki claims there are already around 180,000 of the tracking phones in use. Ducey followed up to ask do “you have a record of people throwing phones away?” Of course not! Nobody throws away a free phone.

Our concern is ensuring individuals who irregularly migrate to the United States proceed through our process of being monitored.” If they toss it in the trash, a black van rolls around to pay the missing migrant a visit, she implies. The monitoring systems [phones], she argued, helped border officials “do that effectively” until “their immigration court hearings could be completed.

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